swiss miss.

In Switzerland...

1. All small children are absolutely adorable.

2. It is perfectly acceptable to pat the butt of the guy next to you to the beat of "Get Ready" at the Montreaux Jazz Festival.

3. No one says anything offensive enough to you to make you change if you just happen to leave your home wearing an entire outfit of neon green.

4. You can swim around a castle, complete with centuries-old poop.

5. If people want to stare at you, they will.

6. Couples are mismatched. Ex: Short man, tall woman; old white man, young Phillippino woman; attractive man, hairy woman; etc.

7. Every one of said couples is DEEPLY in love, complete with hand holding, groping, and the occasional holding of the towel in front of your girlfriend while she changes, without bothering to avert your eyes or stop making out with her.

8. What looks like apple juice is really unsweetened tea.

9. The train leaves on time, whether you are the only one of your family on it or the rest of them have managed to accompany you.

10. Everyone smokes. They all look like they're just regular cigarettes, but I can smell better. Then again, marijuana is legal here.

11. Most guys you can smell while passing them on the street actually smell pretty good. However, the ones that happen to sit across from you on the 45-minute train ride back home do not.

To be continued...